themorallycorruptfayeresnick:

• Find out what a ‘Skrillex’ is.
• Hunt a ’Skrillex’.
• Give to charity more. (Buy Sheree’s new single.)
• Listen to more than 2/3rds of an Adele song without getting nausea. 
• Eloquently articulate my disputation against Katy Perry. Nail it to her door à la Martin Luther.
• End my long running feuds with Trina, Joan Didion and ThoughtCatalog.
• Become BFFs with Tara Reid. Eat pills we find on floors of bus stops together.
• Find out the difference between Ryan Gosling, Ryan Reynolds and Bradly Cooper. Memorize.
• Learn to trust thin-lipped people. (I can’t do it. It’s like their mouth is hiding something.)
• Develop feelings like a normal human being/Commission Temple Grandin to make a hug machine.
• Finish writing that musical about Michaele Salahi.
• #Pray for Michaele Salahi.
• Begin queuing for Titanic 3D.