February 2012
49 posts
nuditea:
“when one door closes, another one opens”
imagine how annoying it would be if that were true
you close the bathroom door to pee and your front door suddenly blows open
your cat escapes
you run out and jump into the car to chase the cat and hear everything falling out of your over-stuffed pantry as its door unlatches
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“I guess I’ll put my sweats on.”
– My boss. I should never have to hear/witness this at work.
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For lent, I’m just giving up.
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A mix CD is like an emotional time-capsule.
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If there's one thing I've learned by having a...
pioneerman:
It all makes sense now…
I think I’d be equivalent to like an A cup when it comes to chest hair.
hotblondecocktail:
My best friend asked me why I like “Murder, She Wrote” so much- “You’re not 80, you know,” and it’s quite simple really- here is this lady, Jessica Fletcher, she’s “single” for all intents and purposes, she has all of these men dying to take her out to dinner and she’ll go and then she’s like PEACE OUT, she travels all over the country about once a week, she’s smart and...
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sleeplessinsouthie:
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“I used to dream whole episodes of designing women.”
– littlekyle
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my southern grandmother's not-so-secret and...
galesofnovember:
So, as many you may have figured out already, many of extended family are members of an elite secret society, whose other members include such notables as George W. Bush, Tom Hardy, and Rober Downey Jr. Like the Shriners and Waterbuffalo (I guess, I’ve never known any) they spend most of their free time at their secret society meetings.
My grandmother was (and is) a sweet,...
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“In a way, this silly little bare-bones reality show fills us with a little...”
– TLo RE: RuPaul’s Drag Race (via avedanke)
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sordid lives
ty: you're sweet.
aunt lavonda: no, i'm not. i'm a bitch. ask your mama.
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“You can see, over and over, people seeing rises in sex hormones — particularly...”
– How Yoga Can Help Your Sex Life (via nprfreshair)
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I am Lady Violet. Always.
So my new job involves planning and coordinating for four different campuses and one of those is our Downtown campus. Anytime I say or do anything related to the Downtown campus, I have to stop myself from yelling, in my meanest/best Dowager Countess voice, “I WAS THE LADY OF THE DOWNTON CAMPUS FOR THIRTY YEARS; I KNOW WHAT I’M DOING”.
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i bought a bag of starbursts to keep on my desk and i hid all the red and pink ones because everyone always eats those first, right? and my office mate busted up in my office all like ‘you already ate all the red and pink ones?’ and i was like oh, yeah, sorry and then she caught me eating a pink one later and i was like what? say something. you best be glad you even got that lemon...
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“Me, it is my fortune and misfortune to know how the spirit-presence of a strange...”
– Walker Percy, The Moviegoer
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Oxford perfect fit for 'just' Eli →
Says Hubbell, the neighbor: “It always amazes me how fast they get back here after the season ends. You’ll watch him on TV one day, and the next he’ll be here.
“Last year, we got a call just a few minutes after they got back, and it was Eli,” Hubbell continues. “‘Floyd,’ he says, ‘I hate to bother you, but I need to borrow a can opener....
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