February 2012
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my southern grandmother's not-so-secret and...
galesofnovember:
So, as many you may have figured out already, many of extended family are members of an elite secret society, whose other members include such notables as George W. Bush, Tom Hardy, and Rober Downey Jr. Like the Shriners and Waterbuffalo (I guess, I’ve never known any) they spend most of their free time at their secret society meetings.
My grandmother was (and is) a sweet,...
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“In a way, this silly little bare-bones reality show fills us with a little...”
– TLo RE: RuPaul’s Drag Race (via avedanke)
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sordid lives
ty: you're sweet.
aunt lavonda: no, i'm not. i'm a bitch. ask your mama.
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“You can see, over and over, people seeing rises in sex hormones — particularly...”
– How Yoga Can Help Your Sex Life (via nprfreshair)
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I am Lady Violet. Always.
So my new job involves planning and coordinating for four different campuses and one of those is our Downtown campus. Anytime I say or do anything related to the Downtown campus, I have to stop myself from yelling, in my meanest/best Dowager Countess voice, “I WAS THE LADY OF THE DOWNTON CAMPUS FOR THIRTY YEARS; I KNOW WHAT I’M DOING”.
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i bought a bag of starbursts to keep on my desk and i hid all the red and pink ones because everyone always eats those first, right? and my office mate busted up in my office all like ‘you already ate all the red and pink ones?’ and i was like oh, yeah, sorry and then she caught me eating a pink one later and i was like what? say something. you best be glad you even got that lemon...
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“Me, it is my fortune and misfortune to know how the spirit-presence of a strange...”
– Walker Percy, The Moviegoer
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Oxford perfect fit for 'just' Eli →
Says Hubbell, the neighbor: “It always amazes me how fast they get back here after the season ends. You’ll watch him on TV one day, and the next he’ll be here.
“Last year, we got a call just a few minutes after they got back, and it was Eli,” Hubbell continues. “‘Floyd,’ he says, ‘I hate to bother you, but I need to borrow a can opener....
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January 2012
41 posts
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rosa—sparks:
Non NFL Manning bro, Cooper, talks about Eli and Peyton
If you ever want to know why I have the worst crush on Eli Manning, besides his amazing ass (that thing belongs in a museum) and being a good QB, is the last part talking about what would happen if the server brought him the wrong meal.
Eli could go to a restaurant and order a steak and they bring him out a flounder and...
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I'm not even gonna lie, y'all.
I have exploited the hell out of my Southern accent for professional gain.
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According to Kathie Lee and Hoda, today is National Have Fun at Work Day, but I think the only way I’ll be able to celebrate is by chugging a coffee mug of chardonnay.
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sleeplessinsouthie:
Oh dear. It’s still not the weekend yet.
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“When you start operating on the principle that you indeed can divide people into...”
– Hanne Blank, The Invention of the Heterosexual (via absurdlakefront)
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My Beyoncé
Whenever I become formally engaged to the man of my dreams, instead of calling him my fiancé, I will call him my beyoncé.
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“No. No, no, no. He wears a Snuggie and watches ‘Extra’”
– Anthony Mackie on Ryan Gosling’s extra curricular activities. (via glossylalia)
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“Elvis was the only man from Northeast Mississippi who could shake his hips and...”
– Jimmy Buffett
I like to think Elvis isn’t the only one anymore.
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